Wednesday, January 8, 2014

slow growing

Well the animals have all been fed and I've had my oatmeal and coffee fix so I'm ready to sit and finish this post I've been attempting to write since the turn of the new year. Life sure is fickle isn't it. I've been thinking back over the past couple years and I hardly know where the time has gone and what I've accomplished. I always set hefty goals for myself, my family and the farm and don't take failing well and the last couple of years I have failed at more things than I can count. The roads I was traveling on not only hit some huge bumps but took some major detours too..and some closed altogether. Life changed, things failed and goals got diverted. I never thought I'd travel the roads I have been on and have struggled with not just maintaining grace but finding it through some of the hardest challenges I've faced so far in my life. Deaths, spiritual, marriage, health, financial - business and personal..there has not been one area that has not suffered and changed dramatically. Living a life in the spotlight as a business owner and sometimes in social media, there are not many places to hide. Sooner or later life spews an ugly head and there we are..smack in the middle, having a meltdown. I am guilty.
But today and this coming year I gratefully grasp to a few simple truths: a broken heart can heal, where there is a closed door there is an open window, when something good is taken away it's because something better is waiting up ahead, new beginnings are often disguised as painful endings and my all time favorites - faith is the courage to let God have control, meltdowns don't last forever and starting over is kinda beautiful. In a round about way I'm kind of starting over and not just a new year but a whole lot of new things..and it is kind of beautiful over here. I'm grateful for the new perspective and looking back I'm glad that's where it's all at..behind me. It's really not at all about where we are at the end of our lives but how we have lived the journey along the way. Gaining perspective is never cheap or free - we'll pay for the wisdom one way or the other. I've lost some and paid the cost but what I've gained in return can not be measured.

So instead of new goals this year, I'm choosing to just slow down. To sit and sit often among my slow growing farm, to watch slow sunrises and sunsets, to nurture slow growing friendships and eat some really tasty slow grown food. And I hope to share some of this slow growing goodness with all of you in new ways this year.
my WillaBee

Happy New Beginning friends!